The problem with the push-and-pull of the ruler scenario to explain FWD vs RWD is you forgot about steering.
By "pushing" the ruler from the back, at only one end, you also move the steering controls to the back, and of COURSE that is gonna suck.
If we all REALLY want to get down to the final analysis, something AWD is always best.
p.s. - I kind of like thhe idea of branding Pontiac as teh "performance" divsion. Pontiac needs something that distinguishes them from the rest of GM, or we'll end up going the way of Olds.