Distant

Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking, and one blonde says to the other, 'Which do you think is farther away... Florida or the moon?'
The other blonde turns and says 'Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida ?????'

CAR TROUBLE

A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died.
After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.
She says, 'What's the story?'
He replies, 'Just crap in the carburetor'
She asks, 'How often do I have to do that?'

O.K. Terry, here is one for you.

This driver lost a wheel because he forgot to secures his nuts when he change his tires and broke down in front of a nut house. He was arguing with himself how he was going to put the tire back on, since he lost his nut, and just as he was about to give up, one of the nut cases look out the window and suggested to him: "Why don't you remove one nut out of the other tires and temporarily install the tire and drive it home?" which he answer:" That is one very intelligent suggestion, but I'm curious, why are you in there with the rest of the nut cases?", In which he quickly responded: "I am in here because I am crazy, not because I am a stupid mother $#@%+*. lol Juan from Chicago

lmao