The Real Jack Schitt. this is hilarious. read it ♥ Share
Sunday, January 31, 2010 at 6:37pm
For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt.
We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, "You dont know Jack Schitt!!"
Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an intellectual way.

Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, who married O. Schitt, the owner of Schitt, Inc.

THey had one son, Jack. In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced six children; Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt.

Against her parents' objections, Deep Schitt married Dump Schitt, a high school drop out. After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later met Ted Sherlock, and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock...

Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brother in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcements in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials.

The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Horse.

Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.

Now when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt", you can correct them.

Sincerly,
Crock O. Schitt

lol - I needed that

I saw the video from where this came from recently, hilarious!!


Steve

Nice!

I heard they also married into the Head family.

I think there also may have been a cousin name Tough.

Their was a cousin named Totally who maryed some dude named Faced.

I head Pisa's last name was Fuking and hyphenated her last name.